Barriss's Blog

Barriss is back!

2006-03-20T14:15:00.000-08:00

Whew! I'm so sorry I haven't been around for a time-I had signed up for Healers Without Systems, traveling the Republic to help people on distant planets! It was a nice break from dealing with the crap I get around here.

I hope I haven't missed anything!

Oh, and Frodo is doing quite well-although he's gotten rather fat. I suspect that a certain Jedi Master who shall remain nameless has been feeding him Cheetos.

sigh That's what happens when you eat crayons!

2005-08-25T12:24:00.000-07:00

No, Obi-Wan, the reason you have um, colored stools is because you ATE CRAYONS. You're not dying of some weird disease. Trust me.

Oh, the things I put up with.

Busy Busy Busy!

2005-08-12T17:15:00.000-07:00

Ah, the clinic is a complete success! We're so busy-between taking care of Fluke, and most recently Jar Jar (after that unfortunate ride with Master Yoda!), and Obi-Wan coming in to treat his hangovers, I hardly have any time to devote to my blog!

Master Luminara's still on vacation, but she has yet to send me a single postcard. Hopefully she won't find out that it was Frodo who knocked over her favorite vase. I'm hoping to find a replacement on eBay. Whooooooaaaa....who knew Alderaanian pottery was so expensive?

The Doctor Is IN!

2005-08-04T18:40:00.000-07:00

Well, I've done it. I've decided that my best way to serve as a Jedi Healer would be to open a clinic in the Jedi Temple. So, from now on, any injuries suffered will be treated by moi.

In the mean time, Master Luminara decided this would be a good time to take a vacation-so I think she went to some place called Barbados. I dunno, it's somewhere really warm and tropical. She said she'd send me a postcard. (Yeah, right, I slave my heiny off for her and all I get is a lousy postcard? Masters get all the fun, I tell you).

Oh, I gotta go-first patient of the day!

-Barriss Offee, M.D.

Ah, it's nice to have the Temple almost all to oneself

2005-07-22T20:41:00.000-07:00

It seems as if everyone is off on some adventure for some Survivor thingy. Not I. I get the Temple ALL to myself. I can watch Law & Order all I want without Obi-Wan stealing the remote and switching to Smackdown, or Anakin and Padme eating each other's faces in the halls, or hearing Mace gripe about dry skin. AND I can eat all the Cheetos I want as well. HA!

This is great!

Sorry I've been slacking lately

2005-07-21T14:50:00.000-07:00

I really don't have an excuse-well, I've recently finished The Half-Blood Prince, that took up plenty of time.

Master Yoda is really angry about the loss of his duckie. Fortunately, I have a life time supply of Oreos in my closet. And I'm open to bribes.

12 more hours to go...

2005-07-15T16:30:00.000-07:00

And then I shall hold Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince in my hands! All of the Younglings are going insane speculating about it. They're so cute. Master Yoda doesn't get it, and someone called him a Muggle behind his back. "A Muggle what is? New Sith curse word, this is? With soap wash your mouths out, I will!"

I have to make sure I'm there to get the mail-otherwise, one of my fellow Jedi (YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE!!!) may nab my copy before I can read it.

Everyone's caught up in this Survivor thingy. I'm a wee bit too busy to join up, but I'll be sure to watch.

Poor Obi-Wan!

2005-07-11T18:35:00.000-07:00

I don't know WHERE Obi-Wan got the idea to go head to head with an evil battle droid, but he did, and so he's in the hospital right now. I'm going to visit him later and bring him some balloons.

Although it IS nice to have the TV to watch old Law & Order reruns, rather than Smackdown all the time. Don't tell him I said so.

What a night!

2005-07-04T11:58:00.000-07:00

Major props to Aayla for throwing an excellent party! Everyone's still talking about it. I just hope she didn't get a crick in her neck after Obi-Wan hung her up in the closet-what WAS he thinking? Oh wait. This is Obi-Wan. Never mind.

In the mean time, I have to stop Frodo from sneaking into her room-he LOVES sitting in front of that aquarium. Maybe I should get one, it would keep him out of trouble. Yesterday, he stole a hot dog from the Temple kitchens, and got about half of it eaten it before I could take it off of him. Unfortunately, I guess, cats aren't meant to eat hot dogs, because five minutes later, he yurked it all up. Gross.

Obi-Wan is getting more and more clues about his twin. I hope he finds him, and I hope said twin has better manners and personal hygiene that our Obi. (Sorry, Ben, you know I love ya to bits, but you really need to take a shower and read some Emily Post.)

Well, I gotta run, I have sparing practice.

All right, fess up?

2005-06-28T17:52:00.000-07:00

Who gave Frodo milk? Kittens, contrary to popular belief cannot digest milk, actually adult cats can't either. Can we say digestive problems? Yuck. If I ever catch who's doing it, he or she will have to clean the litterbox.

In other news, Aayla's having a slumber party to celebrate her newly refurbished room. I'm bringing s'mores. Does anyone like Ouija boards?

My new kitten

2005-06-27T13:10:00.000-07:00

Well, I finally convinced Master Luminara to let me have a kitten! I went to the Humane Society of Coruscant and picked up this little guy:

Isn't he just adorable? His name is Frodo. Obi-Wan wanted to name him Bud (short for "Budweiser", no doubt!) but since I just watched Return of the King last night, I had hobbits on the brain, and decided on Frodo.

Now, I just have to keep him from scratching the furniture in the council chambers.

Obi-Wan and Batman

2005-06-26T19:15:00.000-07:00

A few years back, a bunch of us were invited to this really cool Halloween Party at the Outlander Club. Obi-Wan decided it would be fun to go as Kurt Cobain. When he got there, he got totally hammered (as usual), and ended up spending most of the night with this other guy who was supposed to be some rock star or other.

Well, apparently, it turns out that that other guy is none other than Batman himself-Bruce Wayne!

Who would've thunk it?

(And no, Obi-Wan, I did NOT take the photograph-I don't know who did, mmmkay?)

Well, I guess this is my official blog...

2005-06-26T15:50:00.000-07:00

These blogs are all the rage at the Temple, so I figured I might as well start one. Master Luminara thought it might be a useful exercise. So, here I am.